I've gotta be honest. We watched _Lake Alice_ for exactly two reasons. 1) It has a cool poster. 2) I live with a girl named Alice. That's it. That's all I had to go on as far as expectations went. Yet somehow, it's so awful, I managed to disappointed all the same. No character is likeable, virtually no decision makes sense, the cool poster is a lie, and despite only half paying attention, we were all able to discern the killer's identity, through nothing more than process of elimination. _Final rating:★ - Of no value. Avoid at all costs._